Adapted from a message by Pastor Matt at Hope City Church on 1 Peter 3:1–22. This article is an editorial adaptation of the sermon, rather than a verbatim transcript.
Every relationship we have flows from one relationship first. Before Peter speaks to wives, husbands, or the whole church in 1 Peter 3, he ends chapter 2 by reminding us that we have returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of our souls. Then he begins chapter 3 with three important words: “In the same way.”
As Pastor Matt put it, “Our relationship has to first start with God.” What flows out of us toward others reveals where we are with the Lord.
Start With Your Relationship With God
Pastor Matt pictured it simply: one line reaching up toward God and another reaching out toward people. The Ten Commandments follow that same pattern. The first four deal with how we love God; the last six deal with how we treat others.
When the vertical relationship is right, the horizontal ones begin to change. We cannot love people well while keeping God at a distance. Does He have the key to every room of your heart, or are there places you are still keeping to yourself?
Our Walk Can Speak Louder Than Our Words
In 1 Peter 3:1–6, Peter tells wives that a husband who does not obey the Word may be won “without a word” by their pure and reverent conduct. Character often speaks more powerfully than argument.
Jesus modeled this. Before the religious leaders, before Pilate, and before Herod, He remained silent in the face of false accusations, just as Isaiah 53 foretold: like a sheep before its shearers is silent. Pastor Matt contrasted sheep, which submit quietly, with goats, which kick and fight.
“We can leave people just as amazed by our silence as by our words,” he said. He also shared advice from a mentor that has stayed with him: “You’ll never be hurt by the things you do not say.”
He recalled a hard Sunday when he felt worn down after preaching. Looking to the back of the sanctuary, he saw his wife quietly worshiping with her hands raised. Her silent devotion changed his whole perspective.
Husbands, Lead at Home
Verse 7 calls husbands to live with their wives in an understanding way, honoring them as co-heirs of the grace of life, “so that your prayers will not be hindered.”
“The way we treat our wives can hinder our prayers,” Pastor Matt warned. Spiritual leadership is not about looking strong in public. It is lived out in the home, through patience, honor, and care.
Remember Your Calling
In verses 8–12, Peter calls the whole church to unity, compassion, and humility: “not paying back evil for evil or insult for insult, but on the contrary, giving a blessing, since you were called for this.”
Retaliation comes naturally, whether in person or online. Pastor Matt noted how easily gossip and harsh words spread through social media. Believers are called to something different: to turn from evil, seek peace, and be a blessing wherever God places us. As he said, “Christians should be the best employees.”
Be Patient in Suffering
Verses 13–17 remind us that suffering for doing what is right is not wasted. It is blessed, and it opens the door to share the reason for the hope we have.
Pastor Matt pointed to Daniel. The real miracle began before the lions’ den, in Daniel’s steady integrity. And through his suffering, King Darius saw the faithfulness of God. “Be patient in suffering,” Pastor Matt encouraged, “knowing that God is refining us. He’s growing us.”
All Authority Belongs to Jesus
Peter closes the chapter in verses 18–22 with the heart of the Gospel: Christ suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring us to God. He rose, and He is now seated at the right hand of God, with angels, authorities, and powers subject to Him.
Peter connects this to Noah’s ark. God shut the door to keep those inside safe before the flood came. Pastor Matt urged that the door of salvation through Jesus is open today, but it will not stay open forever.
He also spoke about baptism, comparing it to a wedding ring. Saying yes to Jesus but putting off baptism is like accepting a proposal and refusing to wear the ring. Baptism is a public sign of a commitment already made.
Reflect This Week
- Is your relationship with God truly first?
- Where might your quiet faithfulness speak louder than your words?
- How are you treating the people closest to you, especially at home?
- When someone wrongs you, will you respond with a blessing?
- If you have trusted Jesus, have you taken the next step of baptism?
Prayer
Lord Jesus, thank You for suffering once for our sins to bring us to God. Be first in our hearts. Teach us to honor the people closest to us, to answer insults with blessing, and to trust You when we suffer for doing good. Thank You that all authority belongs to You. Help us live in a way that points others to You. Amen.